Skip to main content

Down Under

Some days are terrible to live through. If you ask me, what happened, did something go wrong? I wouldn't know what to say because nothing did go wrong.I did my daily chores with better attention than usual. I cleared a lot of junk that had piled up around me and I managed to do my prayers on time too.

Funny thing is, I just felt very negative and down under today. Out of the blue, some of my life's most depressing moments flashed before my eyes as though I was watching a movie. That made me feel like a total loser because I could clearly see many evident mistakes that I had failed to learn from at that point of time or even afterward. This higher awareness of what I missed seeing clearly brought me down like anything and I can't begin to explain the throbbing headache that resulted in. I felt like a complete nervous wreck by the end of the day. There are so many friends who are a part of my life so I thought of someone I could just call and talk with. The strangest thing was I couldn't think of a single person I wanted to talk with about how I felt. That made me feel worse.

So, what makes me blog about it? Well, I had to get it off my burning head and talk to people who I believe would not judge me as a lunatic. In real life, even well meaning friends may think, oh god, she must have gone nuts. I believe that here, you will trust me and believe me when I say I really needed to say what's made me feel worse today, over and over again.

The worst thing in life is to see through a lot of incidents from your own life and spot the obvious gaps and realize that you had missed a big chunk of the real picture for a long, long time.  And now, it's too late to put the missing pieces back together again.

Comments

Sarah Naveen said…
True!!! i also have days like this..it will be like a biiig chunk on my mind, which i cant identify, but weighs heavy ...and you dont feel like talking to even ur best friend about it...Life !!! I appreciate u write about it so tt i also came to know that its not only me , who has it :)
Renjith Sarada said…
Dear Swapna,

Bygones are bygones! Just think that God has gifted you something which many dont even get to see!

Thank Him for the wonderful things in life and march ahead. I have learnt, the hard way, that there is no way regretting on something which we didnt get, as the same would have made us crazy and lunatic if we were owning it !!!

Wish you all the best.

Keep writing more!
Renjith
Shilpa said…
life is all about forgetting the past and moving on the present.... yes its true we cant forget the past but then we cant allow our present to get worse just because of the past.... It might take time but then slowly we will forget them too... and after all life goes one :)

So njoy and forget those things of the past... life is too short... enjoy every moment of it....
Lavanya Sriram said…
Swapna,
Everybody has ups and downs in life! and everybody cant act the correct way at all times. Then its not life. Hindsight is so much better.
Dont beret yrself too much abt it.
Think abt it, accept it and move on.
It will make you feel a lot btter once you accept it and yrself.
Cheer up !
Thanks, Eswari and Sarah, for sharing your personal thoughts too. It helps to know that I'm not the only one who passes through such moments and that sometimes we all do in different ways and spaces.

Renjith, you are right. There are so many blessings that we tend to overlook and a good way to feel happy is to thank God for each of those blessings that enrich the quality of our life.

Thanks Shilpa, it's true that life is too short for us to spend wallowing in self-pity. After all, there is so little to time to be happy.

Thanks Lavanya. Yes, we all have our ups and downs. It's something I tell myself too. Yes, I am cheering up because all of you have shared your personal thoughts with me.

Thank you so very much, I feel better already.

Thanks
Shas said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shas said…
Its so true that there are times when no one seems right enough for us to share our deepest thoughts with. Those moments makes us feel so miserable. For me in those moments Blogging becomes a relieving act as it allows me to purge my feelings on my own space. If it generates a positive response its an added joy.

As far as the past is concerned, its best we let it remain in the past. Create new happy "memories" and let them become your new "past".

Cheer up!
Happy Blogging!!!
we all have days like this but tomorrow is a new day lol
Readers Dais said…
Hi! Sapna,
Very true,though we all may have best and dear friends with whom we share our personal matters, our dreams our griefs, when it comes to an inner trauma, where we dont have a substantial reason to worry,but still we are down as u said,then we wont find anyone to share with rather we dont feel confident that so & so person would take it in the right manner and so we keep it within and suffer....there comes this lovely blogspace,where we dont have any inhibitions nor expectations....
hope u are relieved once uve done with this post right :)...
anupama said…
Dear Swapna,
Good Evening!
Every day can't be our day!Right now I want a call,but I know I will not get it as I have blocked it.:(
But I have my own ways to eb cheered!
Well expressed!Good!
You are blessed as you could let them go with words!
Wishing you a wonderful week ahead,
Sasneham,
Anu
Jean said…
I am sure you don't need to be told that there are good days and bad ones, etc etc. You also know how to pull yourself out from the depths.

Instead I'll just share a thought, borrowed from another blogger. "It’s the inevitable fall that follows every climb that gets me…"
It happens.

On bad days, we see the fall after every climb, and on good ones we see the climb after each fall.

Have a terrific day,
@jean_blore
Such warm and wise thoughts from all of you. I don't know whether saying thanks is enough but I do know that it will make you feel happy to know that each one of you shared a piece of your thoughts and values with me in a unique way and that truly made me smile and lifted the clouds away.

I just don't know how to truly thank each of you.

Still. Thank you.
R's Mom said…
hey award awaiting you...cheer up :)
Swathi said…
swpana,

usually some days are like that. But next day cheers up too. Thanks for visiting my blog.

Most Popular Posts

The Ugly Truth about Caste in Kerala

Many years ago, when I wrote this post on Kerala's caste system, I had not considered the possibility that my thoughts and my personal journey would receive such online abuse or that I would be seen as some one who was trying to insult other castes. The intention of writing is always to share an experience and not to insult others. My experience of motherhood and marriage would be different from yours. When I write about my experience, it is illogical to shout that as being insulting to your experience because our journeys are entirely different narratives. 

My question is - why do you ABUSE any caste or person here? You are free to disagree but why do you ABUSE? How does that reflect on YOU?

In my article, I shared what trials I went through, without any intention to insult any community.The intention of my article is to question - why are we even exchanging insults over an issue called caste? 

Should we not be aspiring to be above caste considerations instead of abusing each other …

Mahamrityunjaya Mantra: Meaning, Benefit of Chanting and Who can Chant the Mantra

Mahadmrityunjaya Mantra: Benefit of chanting this mantra nee

There are very few mantras that are as powerful as the Maha Mrityunjaya Mantra. Do read my post: Does Mahamrityunajaya mantra really work?Of course, it does but you need to undertstand the meaning and significance of the mantra first.
This mantra is believed to have the power to remove all sufferings, diseases and bestow the one who chants it with good health and long life. It is also believed that constant contemplation of the Maha Mrityunjaya Mantra can help spiritual aspirants to overcome the cycle of birth and death.
What got me fascinated about this mantra is something personal.  I learned this mantra from my father but it is my maternal grandmother who chanted it all the time and repeatedly told me of its tremendous power to protect. However, I did not chant this mantra regularly. [ Do READ: THE POWER OF LOVE]
But at the age of two, my son was taught some mantras by my mother who explained what it means to him and he becam…

Amazing Signs You are an Earth Angel

Doreen Virtue’s book, “Assertiveness for Earth Angels” brings to life the reality of Earth Angels in very easy way. It’s an exciting must-read! 

[DO READ: The POWER OF LOVE]

Earth Angels have amazing superpowers in: MusicArtsWriting HealingManifesting miracles for others such as controlling weather conditions and  becoming invisible at will.
[MUST READ: A Dad's Advice to the Daughter He loves]
DO READ: ASK MORE, FEAR LESS.

How to Identify Earth Angels by their Traits
To know whether you are an Earth Angel, take a look at their known traits that are explained in this book:


You have a graceful and compassionate aura that inspires people.Your presence “lifts” everyone to happier spirits – it is proof of who you really are.You don’t judge others but you overdo the “acceptance” bit. So, you tolerate even those who show no respect for boundaries.You cannot stand anyone suffering or being in pain. You are constantly “rescuing people” because it is in your nature to want to see everyone happy in …

Sage Tiruvalluvar's golden advice on how friendship affects your life

Ruzbeh N Bharucha's latest book, ICE with Very Unusual Spirits, is a book that I have absolutely enjoyed reading. While reading every chapter, I began to contemplate a lot on the friendships in my life, as the book blends in some of the most valuable teachings of Sage Tiruvalluvar and Sai Baba of Shirdi. The essence of the book revolves around true friendship and how it can make us not just more human but it can make us divine beings too.




As human beings, we thrive on friendship. These days, I've started wondering, ''Is there real friendship out there?'' From experiences that span four decades now (yeah, I am that old!), I am beginning to wonder about the authenticity of most ''friendships.'' [Do read: How to Console a Friend who Lost her Spouse]

A friend whom we knew since childhood days invites us home for dinner but when we visit, we don't get served dinner, but popcorn. Our mistake? We arrived in an auto, instead of a taxi (it is a differe…

Why love matters - Vietnamese monk Thich Nhat Hanh has an amazing insight to share!

What is love? It means different things to different people. 

Have you thought about it? Do read: POWER OF LOVE

When a mother loves her child, have you noticed that the mother's love doesn't change with time or place or even when a child does not reciprocate it? 

Perhaps there is none of the ''my happiness', 'my priority', 'my desires' sort of mentality in the relationship. There is an element of being desireless, in the sense, that the mother wants no material or physical gain from the relationship. The mother may have big dreams of her child becoming X,Y and Z but not necessarily to materially benefit from this. Being itself is enough. 'Being a Mother' is tinged with a sense of happiness despite all the daily struggles and challenges that it brings.

Typically a mother is so engrossed and involved in raising her child, without a sense of a separation of the Self. In a sense, everything else ceases to matter. That kind of love doesn't change…

Ravi Shankar Etteth's novel 'The Brahmin' unravels secrets and mysteries of Mauryan Empire under Emperor Asoka

Set with thrilling historical details and unforgettable characters, Ravi Shankar Etteth's novel 'The Brahmin' kept me glued from start to finish.  The story of 'The Brahmin' revolves around a skillful and ruthless spymaster of Emperor Asoka's court, whose intelligence and cunning helps him to unravel a dangerous mystery of the 'Blood Flower' unfolding across the corridors of power.  


What is it about 'The Brahmin' that allows him to be treated almost an equal by Emperor Asoka?  He even commands the respect of Queen Asandhimitra, who comes to his advice as a friend. Her emotional dependence on 'the Brahmin' is clear as crystal, further strengthened in the narrative through scenes where it seems that she secretly adores the man who can safeguard her husband's powerful empire as well as command the loyalty of Greek soldiers like Antochlius.
More interestingly, the portrayal of powerful and fearless women warriors like Hao and beautiful en…

A Book Review: Custody by Manju Kapur

Manju Kapur's fifth novel – following her highly acclaimed works such as Difficult Daughters (1998) and The Immigrant (2009) – explores the tumultous relationships once again set in the thriving, upper-middle-class colonies of Delhi in the mid-90s. The story thrives against the backdrop of the initial surge of foreign investment in India. The very first chapter of the book begins to enthrall a reader with the couple's love making scene. 

The only glitch is this: it is a married woman having a romantic adventure with her husband's boss. Cheesy as it may seem, the book sets itself apart by diving straight into the troubled waters yet without taking any sides, revealing once again the mark of a true family writer.


Extramarital affair breaks a solid marriage Shagun, the green-eyed beautiful wife of Raman, falls in love with his charismatic, handsome boss Ashok Khanna, who has never been in love before and is determined to possess the woman he now loves. It does not matter to him …

Mumbai Police Movie Review: Prithviraj breaks the typical 'hero' mold, challenges sexual stereotyping

Exploring a completely different dimension in his latest film Mumbai Police, Director Rosshan Anddrews delivers a fast-paced, thriller film after his award winning fims such as Udayananu Tharam, Notebook and others.



To flesh out the script written by Boby Sanjay, Rosshan Anddrews ropes in actors such as Prithviraj, Rahman and Jayasurya to portray three police officers: Antony Moses, Farhan and Aryan respectively.
The story begins with a phone call that Antony Moses (starring Prithviraj) makes to Farhan (starring Rahman) saying that he has solved the murder mystery of Aryan (starring Jayasurya). Just as he says this, there is an accident and Antony Moses loses his memory. From then, Farhan's attempt is to take Antony through people and places that are likely to trigger his memory so that they can solve the murder of their close friend and colleague Aryan. A series of events happen, almost hurtling us towards it.
And I am taking the liberty to hand out trophies for the following:
'M…

Top 10 Skincare tips for Summer

Come summer, and we women worry a lot about how the sun lashes out on our skin. True, skincare tips for the summer are plenty but what about the hushed secrets - yes, those tried and tested family secrets that are passed on from mother to daughters? [ALSO READ: How to NEVER EVER GIVE UP on the spiritual path]

FOLLOW MY BOARDS ON PINTEREST

Here are some that are totally easy to do. Best of all, these are effective and bring on a feel-good factor in the peak of summer.

1. Replace water with rosewater. It keeps your skin luminous and fragrant throughout the day. It's a good toner too.

2. Cleanse your skin by combining these ingredients - honey, milk, rosewater/rosepetals and turmeric. Add a dash of olive oil and yes, it feels wonderful.

3. Almond oil body baths are a must-have! You will smell delicious all day. This summer, skip all those body lotions & moisturizers! You will love the way almond oil pampers your skin all day!

4. Use a mixture of almond oil and olive oil for your fe…

Gayatri Mantra as Panchamukhi: Get it right or let it go

Most people do not understand the importance of chanting the Gayatri mantra because they are not aware of its power. It is only when I began to read Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba's teachings that I learned how sacred and powerful the chanting of the Gayatri mantra is.
The Vedas represent the breath of God. The Gayatri mantra is the very basis of the Vedas. Try not to undertake chanting the Gayatri mantra as a light endeavor or as a hobby. It has to be chanted with faith, discipline and purity of mind and body. Be steady with your sadhana if you want to reap the spiritual dividend associated with the Gayatri mantra  and never once hesitate once you decide to do it.
Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba said that the Gayatri Mantra is referred to as Pancha Mukhi, the Goddess with five faces that represent the five pranas or life forces. Here's more on it.


Chant the Gayatri Mantra correctly: Pause Five Times Here are some important things to keep in mind while chanting the Gayatri mantra:

1. Wh…